Friday, August 14, 2009

It's a Girl Thing

A client came into the studio this morning (where I am the only female) and she was a very cute, 20-something with a Valley girl voice that reminded me of the actress Juliette Lewis.

I thought it was curious that this pretty girl made no eye contact with me and didn't greet me, even though I tried to make eye contact and smile at her. And then continued to not talk to me the entire time. I gave up after awhile.

Why do women sometimes do that? It's like an automatic, subconscious cattiness that comes out when two females who don't know each other meet. And either they decide that it's okay to be real, or 'cool' to each other, or they act fake or they simply ignore each other. I was not partaking in this silent phenomenon. At least, I didn't think I was. I was not competing with this girl, who looked way more hip and done up than I did. I just thought it was curious. And entertaining. And I thought I left it behind in high school.

Of course, the three men in the room had no idea what I was talking about.


Colleen said...

of course they didn't! Oh men... so oblivious to non-verbal communication.

I had the same thing happen yesterday at a bar. The female bartender's all, 'what do you want?' and then was dripping with honey when she asked the man next to me what he wanted.

I just don't get why women have to hate each other.

Kristin said...

I hate when women act like this toward each other. Hello, we are not competing! I think it's so nice when women can embrace each other, and look at each other as allies. So annoying!

Lisa said...

It's all insecurity. Maybe she was hurt by a woman who was as beautiful as you are, Sue. Maybe she felt inferior to you because you were in a position of authority. Maybe she was scared because she didn't know the routine.

I was raised by a woman who was a fashion model in her youth, who never had a close female friend when I was growing up, and who did see other women as competition.

I made a conscious decision to say "Not on MY watch". You have that power too. I can tell you have already adopted the "Not on MY watch" philosophy because I know you....and because this upset you so much.

You are a force for love, good and change. Next time, she will make eye contact, because you are so full of love and beauty that she can't help but stare into those eyes.

Travis said...

It happens between gay men too.

I plead guilty and it comes from pure insecurity. I instantly judge the other gay guy as either hotter or less hot than me. If he's hotter than me I assume he couldn't possibly like me, so I ignore him first. If I find him less attractive I'm still careful not to show too much interest for fear he think I'm being more than friendly.

Catty and sad, but true.

I much prefer women and straight men, no feeling of competition at all.