A client came into the studio this morning (where I am the only female) and she was a very cute, 20-something with a Valley girl voice that reminded me of the actress Juliette Lewis.
I thought it was curious that this pretty girl made no eye contact with me and didn't greet me, even though I tried to make eye contact and smile at her. And then continued to not talk to me the entire time. I gave up after awhile.
Why do women sometimes do that? It's like an automatic, subconscious cattiness that comes out when two females who don't know each other meet. And either they decide that it's okay to be real, or 'cool' to each other, or they act fake or they simply ignore each other. I was not partaking in this silent phenomenon. At least, I didn't think I was. I was not competing with this girl, who looked way more hip and done up than I did. I just thought it was curious. And entertaining. And I thought I left it behind in high school.
Of course, the three men in the room had no idea what I was talking about.
I'm already filling in for a co-worker on maternity leave and another one who is on vacation, in addition to doing my own shift. Late yesterday my boss asked me to come in early (during a split shift? cruel and unusual punishment!) to fill-in for yet another co-worker who called in sick.
Of course, I couldn't sleep, knowing that I had to get up even earlier than usual, or should be humanly possible. Annoyed when my alarm went off at 2:45am, I hated everything and everyone. In my car, I think I actually felt hatred as I was forced to stop at a red light---anything that would stop this day from coming to an end quicker was making me angry. I glared at the road and silently willed other cars to get out of my way.
The only way I could (attempt to) wake myself up was to blast my stereo until my ears rang, but even then Linkin Park and Marilyn Mason didn't seem angry enough. And the coffee I was pouring down my throat as fast as I could was not enough. I think the only thing that will BE enough is when this hell is over.
Please let the next three and a-half weeks go faster.
My eyes were so dry on my way home that when I rubbed my eye, my right contact lense fell out. I was still five minutes away from my house so I put the lense in my mouth to keep it moist and tried not to swallow it.
In between shifts I have exactly enough time to do one task (grocery store, laundry, or other), fix something to eat, take a nap and still leave myself enough time to get back to work for the afternoon shift.
When I woke up again, I saw Sweet Pea for a total of five minutes before I had to leave again. She broke my heart when she said in her little toddler voice, "I want YOU mommy," and she locked her little arms around my neck, "Don't go to work."
My eyes were not dry when I drove away, still watching her wave bye-bye with her arm sticking out from the railing of the deck.
One was issued out of Kittatas County with two toddler boys, 2 and 3-years-old. When I heard it, I got a pit in my stomach. When I had to put my voice on the story, I felt like I could start crying.
What also pained me was that we first got the report an HOUR before the offical Alert was issued by the state, because the small town of Kittitas is not 'connected' to the national Amber Alert system. How far did that white 98 Ford Explorer get in one hour while the local police were deciding how to get the information out? Did that SUV drive by someone who might have reported it, if they knew police were looking for it?
I don't know the circumstances of the story, if the mom accused of stealing her boys is a bad woman or a good woman, if she means them harm or not, but still, I'm scared for those kids.
Not surprisingly, my first day on my new temporary schedule reminded me much of another workplace environment, only not as funny.
It involved many people who were clueless (including me), last minute changes that affected several people who weren't told about them, and a lot of walking around from room to room to find answers that weren't found until after the fact.
It did not end with any equipment being taken 'out back', but I suppose it's never too late for that. I do have until August.
I'm reading this book by Madeleine L'Engle (when I have time), called "Many Waters," part of the "A Wrinkle in Time" series borrowed from my 13-year-old nephew.
It supposed to be an 8th grade reading level, but man, it's really out there...traveling through space and time, story lines interweaving multiple generations, heavy behaviorial themes, incredible fantastical characters and planets. I didn't think these four books would be so involved. I was just looking for something fun to read after Harry Potter!
We were out on the deck on a beautiful, sunny day and I wanted to take some pictures of Sweet Pea. But she wanted the camera instead. I did not let her have it and instead taped her chasing me. I start laughing after awhile, which sounds evil, but was somehow surprisingly therapeutic.
The video is only a minute long, but the actual tantrum was longer. And mind you, this one was of her MILDER ones.
It just seems to be a bad combination: working mornings (getting up at 3:30am) and having a toddler.
Feeding Sweet Pea is usually a challenge because you have to be able to move fast to catch the food that's inevitably thrown. I'm used to that. But last night, at the time of day when I'm running on just fumes, she kept switching chairs (hers has a towel covering it, so every time she switches, the towel has to come too), she wanted to go straight to dessert and skip her rice and green beans (of course), and screamed when she couldn't have whatever she was having in the PINK bowl (what??). I had to ask God for patience as she threw eveything off her tray and started thrashing around in her seat.
I know I'm tired and that I lose my patience faster because of it, but KNOWING that doesn't help. I know she's a 2-year-old and that she will act like one, but that does nothing to slow down my short fuse being lit either.
What's the solution? More sleep? More discipline? Oddly enough, I think it's just spending more time with Sweet Pea when we're both not tired. I'm so "ready-set-go" all day and "I-have-to-get-things-done" that I (sadly) don't have time when she says "Let's read a book" because I have to start thinking about dinner at 4pm so I can eat before 6pm so I can go to bed by 8pm.
I feel so drained by the end of each day. I'm still looking for the mysterious 'balance' that some working moms (or stay-at-home moms, for that matter) have found.
We just interviewed her on the radio. I'm not a fan, I don't watch her show, haven't seen her movies and don't listen to her music, but even I gotta say... there's just something about talking to a famous person, in person.
Here's my short list: Hillary Clinton, Jimmy Carter, Miley Cyrus.
I used to have a MySpace page, but I dumped it for Facebook. Do I really need to Twitter? Yes, apparently, since the morning show producer is getting traffic information faster than I am and I'm the damn traffic reporter.
This is Tia at her Grandma's 80th birthday party. She is a big 2-year-old. She sits at the grown up table and eats off 'big' plates. People say she looks three. I think she's tall, because a lot of her size 2T pants fit in the waist, but are too short.
She's also very chatty for her age. She now says 'stupid,' 'idiot' and 'dammit,' thanks to Mama and Dada.
I am back filling in for my co-worker who's having her second baby (no baby yet, she's on bedrest and due June 10th). She will be out for 3 months.
But I forgot how hard it is to get up for mornings. Usually when my alarm clock goes off, I lie there for a minute and try to wake up, no matter what time it is. But this morning, when the alarm went off, my husband nudged me to turn it off (I'm sorry, was that bothering you??) and that instantly put me in an annoyed mood. That, and I have to work a double shift today!
That said, I'm still glad to be back working in the world of 'adults'. It makes me appreciate Sweet Pea more.
Sweet Pea had cheese slices, turkey lunchmeat and fruit for lunch. She sits at the 'big' table now with Mama and Dada. She puts her bare feet up on the table while she eats, saying, "Look at me Mama, I got my feet on the table," like a little toddler dare that really says "What are you going to do about it?" I threaten to clip her toenails because she hates it, and she takes her feet down. But 2 seconds later, they're up on the table again with the same mocking look on her little toddler face. I get out the baby nail clippers and wrestle her while I clip her big toenail. She's screaming in anguish because it 'hurts', but after I'm done 2 seconds later, she's miraculously recovered...and she seems able to laugh at me with her eyes...with her feet up on the table again! I try to ignore it.
I ask her if she's done eating. She says yes...I make a fatal mistake...I leave the table without collecting her lunch plate first... which has chewed up cheese, turkey meat remnants and sticky fruit cup juice on it. As I turn the corner to the kitchen sink, I don't see it but I hear it: her plastic Pooh bear plate and all its leftover contents flipping up into the air and landing face down on the floor...toddler lunch spread some two feet in all directions. And she's smiling at me.
I briefly lose it: "TIA! No throwing your plate!" I swat her on the butt. I turn her around to look at her face. Have I done anything that will bother this girl? No. She is smiling at me... with that open-mouth smile and her one little dimple in her left cheek like she's about to laugh. And she looks so damn cute. And that makes ME laugh.
There goes any chance of being taken seriously.
Curses on her cuteness!
*I forgot to take a picture of the described event. But the one above will do: it's what you get when you tell her not to stand on the coffee table.
It was actually Tia's and OUR first egg hunt at Edmonds City Park... and will likely be our last. No parents ever warned me about this! There were literally HUNDREDS of people in the park and I had drop off Ian and Sweet Pea and park several blocks away. Needless to say, by the time they reached the '2-year-old section' all the eggs were gone.
But she did find one lonely piece of candy, Smarties, on the ground that she almost stepped on, and that was her Easter find.
Luckily, she had a lot more fun playing on the slides, swinging and climbing on the jungle gym, after the crowds left. Who needs eggs, anyway.
Here we are again...Kristin, me, Skiff and Helen. We were at Daniel's and now I can't remember when that was...a couple of months ago?? Regardless, I've had that picture on my desktop since it was taken. I've been meaning to post it on my blog forever, and just now, I'm getting around to doing it. At the time, it was just going to be a friendly little 'friend' post about how we met and caught up on each other's lives. But now that it's been so long...
Today, I read a post on a blog by another friend of ours, Eric, who wrote his 'Final Post' because he's going to concentrate on writing and publishing. Everything he posted was always so insightful...it always seemed to me to be from the perspective of someone who not only stopped to smell the roses, but picked them and arranged them into a different bouquet everyday and then shared it with us. When I read his 'Final Post' I thought, "Oh no! I missed it! He's gone!"
And then I accidentally clicked on the picture of Kristin, me, Skiff and Helen and it filled up my entire screen. And it made me miss my friends. And that made me realize that I need to make more time...
Why is it, that when you think to yourself "This is a bad idea" you usually go ahead and do it anyway, because you think you'll remember to somehow prevent the inevitable stupid thing from happening?
I thought that when I put my still half-full to-go coffee mug in my purse, in between Sweet Pea's bottle and her sippy cup, which usually stay nicely tucked in on either side of my wallet. I didn't want to have to make more than one trip up from the garage with Sweet Pea, her diaper bag, a shopping bag, my purse and my coffee mug. Lazy mom!
In the few minutes it took me to get upstairs, put everything down and change Sweet Pea's diaper, the entire mug had spilled into my purse and I didn't notice until I lifted it off the counter, where it left a small pool, and it dripped across the kitchen to the other counter, where I set it on top of the Sunday paper, and was now soaking through to the Sports section.
I was about to explode when Ian offered to rinse off the contents of my purse and set them out to dry on the counter.
Then he rinsed off the lining of my purse and hung it over the railing on the deck.
This is less disastrous than the time I left the coffee mug standing on the floor in the back of my new car then backed out of the driveway. I remember thinking at that time too, "This is a bad idea." But I did it anyway.
Okay, Jimmy Carter is a former President, but it was still exciting.
This was a few weeks ago, and the only things I could think of to say were "An honor to meet you, Mr. President" and "You're one of my husband's heroes" because that's what Ian told me minutes before I met him. Maybe I'll have something more profound to say the next time I meet a former President. If there is a next time.
Tia turned 2 on January 19, MLK Day. This is her before her birthday party, quietly enjoying a balloon.
I didn't get any pictures during the party, because my camera ran out of memory and more kids than I expected showed up. If you can imagine 7 little kids under 8-years-old tearing around the house and ending up on our bed (because that's where Tia wanted to open presents), you'll understand why I had no time to click any pictures, even if it had memory left.
In the end, Sweet Pea had a great time, even though older kids were ripping newly-opened gifts out of her hands and shoving new wrapped ones in front of her to open, faster than she could understand what was happening. She even ate some of her birthday cake this time, instead of just mushing it around. I've been warned by other parents not to go near Chuck E. Cheese for birthdays--I think I'll take that advice! It was crazy enough in our own house!
I know I promised pictures of kayaking in the snow, but we are in Hawaii now and this video of Tia boogie-boarding with dad is just too good. She loves it!
Unfortunately, mom is not as good as Sweet Pea in the waves and I have been tumbled too many times in the surf. Ouch! I think she's taking bigger waves than me now! I stay in the white water on the shore now, with the rest of the kids!
Sweet Pea loves the beach and getting buried in the sand.